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Introducing...

"Kenny Rogers is an ass clown"

That was my husband's observation when Mandisa was voted off American Idol tonight and I tend to agree.
I am ashamed of America and I blame Kenny. He LET her sing that Shania song.
She's probably technically the best singer on the show and I think she's gorgeous.
Those responsible for her being voted off can eat poo.

That said, if this is true then I take back the above comments and she deserves to lose!

Yes, little Pickler, YES!

Aw yeah, Kellie Pickler is in the HOUSE!



Loved loved LOVED her version of Fancy. That was my best friend's favorite song in junior high - I LOVE that song. And I think the whole little bit with Seacrest about her mispronouncing calamari and "sal"-mon was planted to set the stage for her to sing that song. She is playing us all and I LOVE her for it. GO KEL!

Everyone else blew, except Katherine, who is probably going to win, so who cares. Why does she have to put that weird voice trilling crap at the end of every single song?!

That said...has anyone seem these two in the same room lately?





No?
That's because they're sharing a vessel while they wait for their time to meet Xenu

Bottom three: Taylor, Bucky, Elliott, Ace.
Oh wait, that's four. Because they ALL need to be kicked off.

Ambivalent Idol Posting..."I hear this is the last season"

Missed the first few performances, but the recap revealed that I didn't miss much.



I was SO bummed with Mandisa's version of the Mary Mary song.

I love that album.



I expected her to nail it. The last note was OK, I suppose.

SCREAMING bald guy has GOT to stop.



I think he just dislodged the effect of my antidepressant and now I need medication for anxiety. Christian's interpretation of Simon's advice that Chris needs to "show us a different side of you,"
"show us your pussy side..."



Katherine, Honey...there's no need to talk. Really. Just sing and look cute. That's all we require from you, Sweetheart.
Christian's comment: "What the hell's she wearing?"
My 2 cents: she's going through the motions; the vocal stunts are annoying.

As for Bucky, I think this link says it all

Princess P is my new favorite! Loved the Beyonce song!

Once again, and lastly, folks, spousal commentary, this time on Elliott:
"He reminds me of 3rd Bass and he's singing that song from that stupid show," said the man married to the only 30-year-old woman who watches One Tree Hill...

No, no, Little Pickler, NO!

UMMM!?!?.....

By popular demand...

Ok, just by Lori's demand...but once again, folks, it's...IDOL COMMENTARY per contestant!
First off, let me say how much I love Mandisa. Although I've only caught a few shows this season, I'm guessing she can do a lot better than this. She sounded off at the end, but Simon LOVED IT. But I love to watch a performer with presence. Jesus, I sound like Paula. And I'm sober. Always.

I want Bucky to go away. That is all.

Paris - a little iffy on the verses, but she really slammed it at the end...Mandy, did ya see your buddy Constantine that they panned in on him after she sang??

I don't dig Whiny Frat Rock, so I'm not really feeling Baldy Chris anyway, but when he hit that first low note...yeesh. He sounds like the lead singer of Live...



Is he also going to sing about placenta like the dude from Live? I think his sound is outdated. I think I want him to go away also. That is all.

Mmmm....Katherine....YUM.
But she made me cringe a bit. Maybe my ear isn't as good as it used to be, but that was a bit stinky at the end...?
Meanwhile, she bears a resemblance to another celeb...



I was too busy picking my nose when Taylor performed...sorry. But judging from Paula's reaction, he made her wet her little alcoholic Depends panties. She is so far gone. She's going to have all of America to apologize to when she finally begins her 12 step program.

Who is this next chick? She is decidedly mediocre. And when she was picking out her new school clothes out of the Sears & Roebuck catalog with her mom, she might have considered purchasing pants from the knees-down.

Ok, Dennis the Menace needs to lose the spectacles. Also, he doesn't blink often, does he?



Did he bring Paula to tears, or is her Xanax wearing off?

I felt like this next white guy was trying hard to birth a member of Boyz II Men through his thin, delicate adam's apple. I just don't see the "fantastic" Simon mentioned. I was bored bored bored. He needs to get a goofy pair of glasses to complete with Owl Boy.

I don't usually take Pickler seriously, but she did a good job tonight. Did anyone else see Paula leer at her afterwards? I think Paula wanted a piece of that "tigress." Ok, when she was laughing at the Pickle on the sign behind the judges, I half expected her to eat her own fist. Is she ON SOMETHING??? And if so, I would like the diagnosis code so I can pass it on to my internist.

Oh, and the little blond girl Ryan Seacrest keeps talking to in the audience....I KNEW they froze Tina Yothers after Family Ties was canceled. Finally - proof.



Ace - everyone's applauding him because he actually hit a couple notes. I did that in the shower this morning, but no one applauded me. I am tired. Very, very tired. I cannot believe I just watched 2 hours of American Idol. God help me regain these brain cells...

Norcross, Ga. is for Lovers

The husband and I had a fantastic weekend with our favorite Atlanta Lanes...OK, probably the ONLY Lanes from Atlanta we know, but our favorite, nonetheless, Mark & Tia...



We ate yummy, LEGENDARY food, stuffing our gullets beyond belief.

When we got home, we realized we hadn't taken a single picture the entire weekend, but decided that meant we had been too busy enjoying ourselves, aside from transit adventures with a bulimic-carsick Pomeranian.